Britney teaches kids to dance

Britney Spears returned to Millennium Dance Complex Tuesday night to once again teach kids to dance. People says the kids really loved it.

“I like Britney,” 5-year-old Elissa Bouganim, who has taken three classes with the pop star, tells PEOPLE. “Today, first we were dancing slow, and then faster and faster … Then we did the fish-move and lots of other fun things.”

“It’s just amazing to watch Britney with the kids,” says Elissa’s mom, Pam. “Elissa won’t stop dancing now, that’s all she wants to do. Britney has really inspired her.”

I want to let little Elissa Bouganim in on a secret. That fish move Britney was doing? That was an epileptic seizure brought on by years of drug abuse. Flopping around on the floor and foaming at the mouth, although hilarious, is not a dance move. And to Elissa’s mom: The reason your kid can’t stop dancing is because she accidentally drank Britney’s water which Sam Lutfi has been secretly spiking with uppers. You might want to get her stomach pumped.

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