Everyone wants to be a Scientologist

Rumors of Pete Doherty joining Scientology have made their way to the media. After meeting Scientologist DJ Nadine Ruddy, Pete Doherty began intensely reading about the cultish religion.

“Nadine is really into Scientology. She takes her beliefs very seriously.

“Pete’s chatted a lot with her about it. He went out and bought some books to read up about it.

“He just wanted to find out more about Nadine and what she believes in.”

What an amazing new acquisition for the church. At the bi-annual Scientology meeting, they’ll ask Tom Cruise, “Who did you bring in Tom?” “Will Smith and Jada Pinkett,” Cruise will shriek while happily rocking back and forth on his heels. Thunderous applause will be heard throughout the room. Then they’ll turn to DJ Nadine Ruddy. “Who did you bring in Nadine?” She’ll look around nervously and quietly whisper, “Pete Doherty?” Chuckles and scoffs will then echo among the crowd. “No, no. This simply will not do,” they’ll reply as they shake their heads in disgust, pull out a gun and shoot her.

Partner highlights
Notify of
1 Comment
Newest Most Voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
13 years ago

That’s *exactly* what my religion is like.
Thank you for jumping on the Scientology bashing bandwagon, and thus moving us one step further back in the tolerance and “let’s all live in peace” gauge.

Nevermind all our volunteer activities, our literacy programs and the countless people we help. All you can do is pick at the celebrity crap and foster the idea that we’re all loons.

You think it’s funny, but it’s sad.

Scientologist and proud of it

Load more