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Happy Monday, Paris ate it

Paris Hilton

Paparazzi were chasing Paris and her boyfriend Benji Madden in Berlin over the weekend and as the two were running away, Paris tripped and fell face first into the hard, unforgiving concrete. Haha, retard. Sadly, no one managed to snap pictures or take video. There was only the before and after. Nevertheless, it was a momentous occasion for both of us. For me, it marked the 100th time I laughed my ass off at Paris’ shortcomings. I celebrated by punching out a cardboard cutout of her. For Paris, it marked the first time her chin smacked against something other than balls. I believe kudos are in order.

Video of Benji crying about it below.

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capt. cornhole

On your cardboard cutout of Paris, do you have holes for the mouth and chitlins?

ahh what fun that could be, grabbing her by her cardboard ears….

you could turn it around, brown side up, and cornhole her too….

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