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Amy Winehouse is getting a divorce

Amy Winehouse has admitted that she is seeking a divorce and claims that her marriage to Blake Fielder-Civil is un-salvageable. Blake has already moved on with a German model named Sophie. Sorry, Winehouse fans.

Additionally, Winehouse, unsolicited, mentioned they were just in it for the sex which caused everyone to dry heave. Despite adamant refusals by News of the World to not go any further and plugging their ears and going, “Lalalalala,” the source went on to describe it.

“It’s been a real eye-opener,” said our source. “Amy told me they were mad for each other, experimenting all the time.

“Mostly it was Blake suggesting new things but Amy doesn’t need encouragement. They were like animals, at it all the time.

“Just like they were with drugs, they pushed themselves to the limit.

“They were into threesomes. It was Blake’s idea but Amy said she’d been with women before so it wasn’t a problem. She said she’s had a string of female lovers.

“Whenever Blake said he wanted three-in-a-bed Amy would fix it.

“They didn’t care about sharing themselves with others because it turned them on. They thought they were on this sexual journey together.

“And the pair of them were into some real kinky stuff, not just the usual bondage and sex games but really gross stuff you couldn’t mention in a newspaper.

“Amy said that was the basis for their relationship. It was built on sex so when he went inside prison there was nothing for them to fall back on.

“Stuff you couldn’t mention in a newspaper.” They probably injected their genitals with heroin while rubbing their infected wounds over each other; the friction of their bodies causing their scabs to peel off and ooze out puss. In their heads, this was probably the most exhilarating and beautiful thing in the world. To anyone else accidentally walking in, it would look like two mangy, rabid, frothy badgers fighting over a piece of meat.

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Brandi
Brandi
15 years ago

Uh, was all that necessary? I just threw up my lunch~
;(

Sarah@MaterialBITCH
15 years ago

::puke:: lmao – Amy Whorehouse – I will never understand.

xoxo

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