Cristiano Ronaldo is a Superman

Cristiano Ronaldo's smashed Ferrari

Manchester Utd’s Cristiano Ronaldo was driving through a tunnel at Manchester Airport this morning in his $400,000 Ferrari when he lost control and smashed into a wall. No word on how fast he was going, but witnesses say his car was a “mangled wreck.” Ronaldo managed to walk away from the accident unscathed and went to practice with his team. Another witness tell The Sun:

The front of Ronaldo’s car was completely mangled. There was metal all over the road and debris – and we had to dodge our way through it. Ronaldo was just standing at the side of the road looking forlorn and bewildered.

So now not only does Ronaldo make a lot of money and get to bang hot women every day, he’s also invincible. He probably doesn’t age either. Whatever. His life isn’t so great. Today I dropped my peanut butter jelly sandwich on the floor. There was only one hair and a few specks of dirt stuck to it this time. Suck on that Honaldo!

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OMG… He must have been driving like a nutz! Poor car!


The word is that his teamate Manucho (or something) was sucking his cock and that made him lose control of the car. When I say “the word is” what I mean is that is the rumour I’m spreading about the dirty little cheat.

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