London was covered in enough snow yesterday to warrant shutting down everything. Everything except people’s hearts. Kids who would normally be in school went outside to make snow angels, snowmen, snow forts and snow ammunition. They then beat the shit out of each other with their icy spheres of death. At least that’s what I imagined happened. Because if Calvin and Hobbes has taught me anything, it’s that there’s no greater joy than nailing an unsuspecting victim in the back of the head with a snowball. Especially if that victim happens to be a girl you secretly like.
Lily Allen was seen engaging in her own snowball fight with paparazzi. Although, she didn’t even bother packing it. She just picked up a chunk of ice and threw it at the photogs. This proved ineffective as the snow crumbled in mid-air. Here’s a tip, Lily: Next time, pack your snowball tight and with rocks. I find it’s hard not to be declared the winner when your opponent is lying unconscious on the ground.