Gisele isn’t pregnant

Tom Brady yesterday shot down reports that he and Gisele Bundchen are expecting. Brady said, “One is enough. I have dogs and that’s all I need.”

Brady has the right idea. I’ll never understand why people impregnate their supermodel girlfriends right after they marry. You’d think they’d not want them to get fat for almost a year and squeeze out a little demon that makes said supermodel too tired for sex. It’s like winning the lottery and putting all that money into a CD. Normal people don’t do that. They blow it on hookers and risky investments.