Britney Spears showed up at the pool

Britney Spears took her son and her janky weave to the Ritz Carlton in the Marina Del Ray over the weekend to spend a day frolicking in the shallow end of the pool and freaking out when balls flew at her face. Odd. She should be used to that by now.

Anyway, she doesn’t look too bad except for when she sits down. Which is too bad because sitting is my favorite activity. Maybe Britney can find a way to stand up forever. I propose we fuse a metal rod to her spine. You’d think that’d be cruel and unusual, but may I remind you the alternative is looking at Britney’s fat fold over on itself like an accordion.