Britney takes her bikini on tour
Day 4 of Britney Spears in a bikini took her out of the Ritz Carlton and onto David Letterman where she read the Top 10 list. The list for last night was “Ways the World Would Be Different If Britney Spears Were President.” What would those be, pray tell?
10. I’d be the first president to wear eye shadow since Nixon
9. We would only invade fun places like Cabo
8. Free pie for everybody
7. My situation room would be a cabana at the Palms Casino at Las Vegas
6. I’d lure Osama out of hiding with the irresistible scent of my new fragrance Circus Fantasy
5. Every presidential news conference would feature costume changes
4. America might have a more coherent fiscal strategy
3. Challenge U.S. to put nightclub on the moon by the end of the decade
2. Three words: Vice President Diddy
1. Finally the media would pay some attention to me.
The most shocking thing about last night: Britney is literate. The least shocking thing about last night: Britney loves pie. Although, the list would have been more believable had they mentioned something about lack of panties and more food.
You appear in rare form today. Kudos. Although, pie is awesome. Cold key lime and a scoop of ice cream on a a warm summer day on the farm. Heaven. And literacy is is a big problem for US Americans. Don’t be a douche. And Brooklyn Decker. Why I never! And what areolae. And what hips. I always wonder if you have a top model as your wife and she poses nude regularly — Brooklyn Decker, Marissa Miller, Julia Stegner, Sara Stone (check her out), et al — do you consider that weirdos and troglodytes like TheBlemish are whacking it… Read more »