ESC

Adrianne Curry has grown

If you’re wondering why you haven’t seen any recent ignorant myspace posts from Adrianne Curry, it’s because she took time away from the limelight to get fat, grow up, and make her return to making ignorant statements.

“I was hiding my fat ass until I lost a bunch of weight. A few weeks ago I went in for my yearly womanly exam and I weighed in a 150.5 pounds and I crapped my pants,” Curry added. “I am on a no-carb diet. So I’ve started eating fish, steamed vegetables, no butter, no sugar, no bread, and no fun and now I’m at 136 pounds. I’m also going to the gym, I don’t believe in being thin disgusting. I like to have muscle.”

How revolting for a 5’10” semi-muscular woman to weigh in at a healthy 150.5 pounds. Good thing she lost 14.5 pounds in just a few weeks. It sets a great example for impressionable, healthy females out there. Adrianne continues telling Fox News,

“My only regret is that now I’ve decided not to share my life (her VH1 reality show “My Fair Brady” ceased filming two years ago) people can’t see that I’m mature. I’ve grown up oodles, people only get to see me acting like a 22-year-old on replays but I’m now 27, I’m pushing 30. The old broad had to grow up without you.”

Using the descriptive “oodles” to detail your growing up is confusing. Everything about Adrianne Curry is confusing. She’s kind of hot but everything out of her mouth makes me want to slit my wrists. It’s okay though. I kind of like being aroused and suicidal at the same time.  It makes my loneliness a smidge more enjoyable.

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