“Divorce is 100 percent on”

Confirming yesterday’s rumors, a source close to Tiger Woods’ wife Elin Nordegren says that a “divorce is 100 percent on.” Elin is apparently looking for a divorce attorney right now and will be heading to Sweden to avoid the spotlight. The source continues that Elin isn’t rushing into it and that “She’s going to take her sweet time. She wants all the dirty laundry to be out on the table before she signs anything.”

“It would not appear that Elin Nordegren is going to be standing by her man,” Kate Coyne, senior editor at People Magazine, told “Good Morning America.” “Sources have told us that Elin has told us this marriage is over and she is looking to divorce.”

There’s good news and bad news for Tiger. The bad news is he’ll probably lose half his fortune, his kids and the respect of his peers. The good news is now he can get back to the sport he truly loves. That of banging blonde chicks and porn stars.

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