I think the main reason why I don’t get invited to these things or get my site name up on the banner like Just Jared is because I always push my way up to the front and yell, “Moar whore! Give me moar whore!” Aside from no one understanding what that means, security gets really anxious when they see a guy yelling angrily at celebrities and fumbling through their pockets. Chill out, dudes. It’s just me masturbating.
PS. Leighton is going to be hosting Tao on Friday, Jan 2. Sadly, I can’t make it, but maybe someone who can make it can go heckle her for me?