Tara Reid in Playboy, promises it won’t be frightening

Due to Satan winning a chess match against God, Tara Reid changed her mind about posing in Playboy and now you’ll be able to see her in her naked glory (topless only) on December 18 when the new issue hits.

In an interview with WPIX, Tara talked about the surgeries that Frankensteined her tits and stomach. She says her Shauna Sand nipplitis and bulldog abs are fixed now and have been for the last five or six years (this is what she looked like in 2006) , but she whines that people just love to show the old pictures of her (this NSFW) and that it’s unfair. That’s why she did Playboy. So, my plan to shame her out of existence pretty much backfired. Crap.

Tara then compared her botched surgery to breaking an arm. Everyone knows she “broke her arm”, but now it’s fixed and her “arm” looks great. In this case, her “arm” is her tits and it was more than just “broken”, it looked like doctors had to transplant an entirely new areola onto her breasts.

Asked why now, Tara says she’s been offered it in the past, when she looked much, much better, but now that she’s in her 30’s, she figured, “why not?” Translation: She needs the money. Being a sideshow celebrity freak isn’t what it used to be.

Up top is a preview of Tara’s cover. Below is her interview.