ESC

Tiger Woods overdosed?

The day after Thanksgiving (the day of his crash), Tiger Woods was supposedly brought into Health Central Hospital on an apparent overdose. Sources claim Tiger was having trouble breathing and that the admissions chart lists “OD”. To keep his anonymity, Tiger was admitted under the alias William Smith and the entire fifth floor of the hospital was locked down. Because that should keep people from wondering if a famous person just checked in. TMZ continues:

As we first reported, Elin gave paramedics two pill bottles at the accident scene — we now know the prescriptions were for Ambien and Vicodin. Tiger was in and out of consciousness, snoring at the scene, and our sources say he clearly appeared to be under the influence of something — not alcohol.

We’re also told doctors used a breathing tube to assist his respiration.

Whatever. I bet he was playing sick like kids do when they don’t want to do something. In this case, Tiger was avoiding Elin’s foot up his ass. Elin was running after him like the T-1000 and smashing his car window with a golf club. Clearly, the safest thing to do was play dead. As I’m told, that works for both bears and wives that found out they’ve been cheated on.

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