ESC

Tiger Woods had period sex

One of the better stories about Tiger’s infidelity comes today by way of Vanity Fair. They’re running a story called “The Temptation of Tiger Woods” where a bunch of his friends/whores come out and call him a pervert. Alongside stories of playing 30 grand a hand with Michael Jordan and Charles Barkley in Vegas, being cheap and his late father also being a womanizer (read about those here), is a story of Mindy Lawton who said The National Enquirer caught her having period sex with Tiger Woods and kept her bloody tampon as proof. Here. Read this while I go vomit.

Mindy Lawton says she met Woods for one rendezvous at 5:30 in the morning, before he had to leave for a golf tournament. Although she was menstruating, he insisted on having sex with her, but when the key card to access his office didn’t work, he drove to a nearby parking lot, where they had sex in his car. After they left, Lawton claims, reporters from The National Enquirer, who had been following her, picked up the tampon she had dropped in the parking lot, and later threatened to use it as part of a story exposing Woods’s infidelity. When the tabloid contacted one of Lawton’s relatives, Lawton texted Tiger in a panic, and he put her in touch with Mark Steinberg. “That’s when their brush-under-the-rug, the cover-up, happened,” Lawton says, referring to a deal that the Enquirer allegedly made with Tiger’s handlers to hold the adultery story in exchange for Woods’s giving an exclusive interview to its sister publication Men’s Fitness. (A spokesperson for The National Enquirer denies that the paper held the Lawton story in exchange for an exclusive on Tiger.)

First of all, who throws a bloody tampon in a parking lot? Trash cans were made for a reason. Second, Tiger must be horny all the time. I’m surprised his pelvis isn’t constantly thrusting back and forth just waiting for someone to back up into it. If it wasn’t for the looming threat of a golf club to the face, he’d probably hump a woman’s leg within five seconds of meeting her.

Up top is a photo of one of Tiger’s other mistresses Loredana Jolie Ferriolo.

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