Lindsay was lying, obviously

Remember last week when Lindsay Lohan said she had a plane ticket in hand, ready to board a flight back to the US to make it to court in time but at some point couldn’t get on the flight because she had lost her passport? Well, you may be shocked to find out that that may have been a lie.

After Lindsay showed up in court today, her lawyer, Shawn Chapman Holley, failed to provide proof that Lindsay had a plane ticket back to LA for May 19. What she provided instead was an itinerary for travel on May 18th and a copy of Lindsay’s ticket and boarding pass for May 22nd. Which is stupid because the whole world already knew she was back in LA on Saturday.

Lindsay is such a bad liar. If the judge put her on the spot and asked about the ticket during the hearing, Lindsay would have tensed up and went “uh, uh, uh,” trying to buy time and, after a minute, say that a bear ate it and then pull up the YouTube video of the kung fu bear and go, “That’s him. That’s the one. He ate my plane ticket.”