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Lindsay Lohan denies everything in Vanity Fair

Vanity Fair did an interview with Lindsay Lohan before she served 14 days in jail and 23 days in rehab. There’s nothing groundbreaking about it unless you consider denying everything and making excuses for yourself “groundbreaking”.

The first thing out of Lindsay is that she’s not on any drugs and she’s not an alcoholic. “If I were the alcoholic everyone says I am, then putting a [SCRAM] bracelet on would have ended me up in detox, in the emergency room, because I would have had to come down from all the things that people say I’m taking and my father says I’m taking—so that says something, because I was fine.” Yea, maybe. Except that her SCRAM did go off when it detected alcohol in her body and she tried to trick the judge by submitting to a urine test after the alcohol dissipated from her body.

Lindsay goes on to explain why her father is an asshole which is true. She talks about her father’s unexpected appearance at her hearing. “The worst part of it is you turn around and you see your dad crying and normally you’d be, like, happy that your father’s there. But then he has to go and do an interview right after.”

Then Lindsay proves she’s definitely on drugs. “I don’t care what anyone says. I know that I’m a damn good actress. … And I know that in my past I was young and irresponsible—but that’s what growing up is. You learn from your mistakes.” Or maybe she’s just delusional?

Oh, but then Lindsay admits to dabbling. “I’ve never abused prescription drugs. I never have—never in my life. I have no desire to. That’s not who I am. I’ve admitted to the things that I’ve done—to, you know, dabbling in certain things and trying things ’cause I was young and curious and thought it was like, O.K., ’cause other people were doing it and other people put it in front of me. And I see what happened in my life because of it.”

And like any interview with Lindsay, she must find a scapegoat to blame her problems on. “So many people around me would say they cared for the wrong reasons. A lot of people were pulling from me, taking from me and not giving. I had a lot of people that were there for me for, you know, the party.”

If you’ll remember, Dina once said she let Lindsay move to LA because she was fine with Lindsay living and falling on her own. Turns out that was a horrible idea. “it was very go-go-go and I had a lot of responsibility; and I think just the second I didn’t have [structure] anymore—I was 18, 19—with a ton of money and no one really here to tell me that I couldn’t do certain things … And I see where that’s gotten me now, and I don’t like it.” Oh and then she blames more people for her problems. “really scary and sad… I would look up to those girls… the Britneys and whatever. And I would be like, I want to be like that.”

To summarize, wah wah wah, I don’t do drugs or drink and nothing is my fault.  I’m Lindsay Lohan. Everyone is out to get me. I don’t take responsibility for anything I’ve done. Wah wah wah.

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