ESC

Jessica Simpson Uses Her Breasts to Escape Parking Tickets

Jessica Simpson’s photoshopped picture is on the PEOPLE Magazine’s Most Beautiful of 2011 but a picture doesn’t give quotes so they had to go to the real Jessica and asked her about her breasts. Here’s what she has to say.

Being well-endowed since sixth grade, the blonde bombshell points out that “there’s no way to hide them as much as you want to bandage your boobs down.” Simpson, 30, has since learned to embrace her chest as her “best accessory,” telling PEOPLE, “Now I can make my way in and out of parking tickets: Show the girls and give a wink!”

You mean five years ago when she was hotter, right? Because the only way she gets out of parking tickets with them now is if the cop sees donut crumbs and powdered sugar sitting in her cleavage.

Subscribe
Notify of
guest

1 Comment
Oldest
Newest Most Voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Chewy
Chewy
12 years ago

If Jessica started winking at me, I’d write her two tickets. Just cuz.