Kirstie Alley Lost Her Shoe

Last week, Kirstie Alley’s partner’s thighs gave up under the strain of carrying her and she ended up hitting the floor like a sack of potatoes. “Mm, potatoes,” Alley thought to herself.

This week on Dancing With the Stars, her shoe quit her. At least it tried to before she forced it back onto her pudgy little feet. Alley joked to Us,

“I think it’s a conspiracy! I think the other girls cut my shoe! I don’t know if I handled it well or not well!” she added of the dropped shoe. “When your shoe comes off, you either put it back on or you take it off, one or the other.”

But Alley’s still confident about Tuesday’s results show. “I want to win. And I want to win by being the best! I got an 8 — but I can’t help but think if I did the dance correctly, we could have gotten some 9s. I really do want to be a good dancer and I’m working on it.”

She added that she doesn’t want to “become the mercy f***”, garnering sympathy votes from fans. “I want people to vote for me because I’m good. I really do!”

To be fair, everyone agrees sympathy votes are her best chance at winning. And she’s going to get them. Watching her have a mini-heart attack and not die after every routine is amazing. You’d think whenever she lays on the ground like that, she won’t be getting back up without a specially designed pulley system, but look, she did it! To hell with gravity! What an inspiration.

Notify of
Newest Most Voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
9 years ago

Do you mean “hoof?”

9 years ago
Reply to  buttmo'

And by shoe, do we mean horseshoe? I thought those things were nailed on…

Load more