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Lindsay Lohan Won’t Be Making Any Comeback

Lindsay Lohan was planning on making a career comeback after her trouble with the law. The one where she faced no consequences. Anyway, her comeback isn’t going so well. She started by being downgraded to a bit part and then to “we’ll think about it” in the Gotti biopic which is running into a lot of roadblocks.

Now reports are surfacing that Lindsay almost snagged a part in Steven Soderbergh’s new film Magic Mike starring Channing Tatum and Alex Pettyfer. She would have played Pettyfer’s girlfriend described as a character that’s “trouble with a capital T.” That’s pretty much Lindsay in a nutshell. Instead, the part went to Riley Keough (Elivis’ granddaughter and Lisa Marie Presley’s daughter), a newcomer. Why a newbie over a “seasoned vet” like Lindsay?

“He didn’t want to deal with all that,” our source spills. “Nobody wanted to go there.”

That’s telling when not even Steven Soderbergh will take a chance on you. He cast a porn star in Sasha Grey whose only film experience is going “uhhhh” on camera and an MMA fighter in Gina Carano whose only experience is kicking ass but not Lindsay Lohan. She’d be too much to handle.

Since Lindsay’s unemployed, she needs to find other ways to make money. Hence, the lawsuit she filed against Pitbull over his song Give Me Everything. Lindsay claims the lyrics “Hustlers move aside, so I’m tiptoein’, to keep flowin’, I got it locked up like Lindsay Lohan,” is damaging her reputation. Lindsay wants an injunction to stop the broadcast of the song and, of course, unspecified damages.

Lindsay is pissed, claiming in her lawsuit … “the lyrics, by virtue of its wide appeal, condemnation, excoriation, disparaging or defamatory statements by the defendants about the plaintiff are destined to do irreparable harm to the plaintiff.”

Lindsay, who claims in the lawsuit she is “a professional actor of good repute and standing in the Screen Actors Guild, is suing under the New York civil rights laws, which protects people from having their name exploited for commercial purposes.

Lindsay alleges the appearance of her name in the song “causes [Lindsay] to be associated and identified in connection with defendants.”

I guess Lindsay doesn’t want her name sullied in places where people haven’t read about what a complete screw-up she is. Like in that one region of New Guinea where they just discovered a new tribe.

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Chewy
Chewy
9 years ago

Yea, let’s not damage Lindsay’s reputation as a saint. That wasn’t her doing coke, driving drunk, fleeing the scene, violating probation over and over, and so on and so forth.

In fact, I want songs sullying her reputation broadcast 24 hours a day with speakers pointed right at her Venice Beach home.

sweetiepie
sweetiepie
9 years ago

Wait a minute.  Didn’t her attorney state in court that Lindsay was not a memeber in good standing of SAG, and that’s why she hadn’t started her mandatory therapy – because she couldn’t get it through union benefits?  So, which is the lie?

Anonymous
Anonymous
9 years ago

Maybe she can take a guest spot on the next Ke$ha record.

Anonymous
Anonymous
9 years ago

Please, Lindsay, die already.  Please.  I’m asking nicely.  Just OD.  We all know you’re going to do it anyway, so please just do it and we can all get on with our lives without you.

cool aid
cool aid
9 years ago
Reply to  Anonymous

Not quickly…c’mon.  Maybe they can do a reality show on her slow demise.  Watch her suck dick for crack.  Watch her do porn and get fucked airtight?  We don’t want any mystique left, then her scumbag parents might squeeze a nickle out of her corpse.  Let’s line all of them up and steam roll them, feet to heads.  Then the season finale will be their collective, empty heads pop!  Yay!

datoof
datoof
9 years ago
Reply to  Anonymous

Yeah, real slow…like from AIDS…only she can’t afford the medicine.  And what’s up with that horribly ugly dyke she’s in love with, Sam?  If my dog looked like her I’d shave his ass and make him walk backwards.

YoureembarrasingDaddy
YoureembarrasingDaddy
9 years ago

What a Douche

Fedcbbb
Fedcbbb
9 years ago

“He cast a porn star in Sasha Grey whose only film experience is going “uhhhh” on camera”

I think she did a lot more than that…

Chewy
Chewy
9 years ago

Yea, let’s not damage Lindsay’s reputation as a saint. That wasn’t her doing coke, driving drunk, fleeing the scene, violating probation over and over, and so on and so forth.

In fact, I want songs sullying her reputation broadcast 24 hours a day with speakers pointed right at her Venice Beach home.

sweetiepie
sweetiepie
9 years ago

Wait a minute.  Didn’t her attorney state in court that Lindsay was not a memeber in good standing of SAG, and that’s why she hadn’t started her mandatory therapy – because she couldn’t get it through union benefits?  So, which is the lie?

ChasInNJ
ChasInNJ
9 years ago

Maybe she can take a guest spot on the next Ke$ha record.

Electro_Jones
Electro_Jones
9 years ago

Please, Lindsay, die already.  Please.  I’m asking nicely.  Just OD.  We all know you’re going to do it anyway, so please just do it and we can all get on with our lives without you.

cool aid
cool aid
9 years ago
Reply to  Electro_Jones

Not quickly…c’mon.  Maybe they can do a reality show on her slow demise.  Watch her suck dick for crack.  Watch her do porn and get fucked airtight?  We don’t want any mystique left, then her scumbag parents might squeeze a nickle out of her corpse.  Let’s line all of them up and steam roll them, feet to heads.  Then the season finale will be their collective, empty heads pop!  Yay!

datoof
datoof
9 years ago
Reply to  Electro_Jones

Yeah, real slow…like from AIDS…only she can’t afford the medicine.  And what’s up with that horribly ugly dyke she’s in love with, Sam?  If my dog looked like her I’d shave his ass and make him walk backwards.

YoureembarrasingDaddy
YoureembarrasingDaddy
9 years ago

What a Douche

Fedcbbb
Fedcbbb
9 years ago

“He cast a porn star in Sasha Grey whose only film experience is going “uhhhh” on camera”

I think she did a lot more than that…

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