This story is boring so I decided to spice it up a little. Reese Witherspoon was out jogging in Santa Monica Wednesday afternoon when an 84-year-old woman tried to murder her with a car. She failed as the aura of celebrity prevented Reese from being seriously injured.
The incident occurred during a jog in Santa Monica, Calif., a rep for the actress, 35, confirms to PEOPLE. The driver, an 84-year-old woman, was cited for failing to yield to a pedestrian in a crosswalk, say reports.
Explaining that she was not seriously injured, the rep says Witherspoon is “resting comfortably at home.” — PEOPLE
I’m surprised a bunch of paparazzi didn’t descend on her like locusts offering her a hand and a call to an ambulance and then give her their cards telling her that since they did her a solid, she should do them a solid.
Your Prayers Have Been Answered, Ed Sheeran Might Quit Music
Vin Diesel Says He’d Whoop The Rock
Did Aaron Hernandez Kill To Cover Up His Homosexuality?
The Rest of the Web, Friday, 4.21.17
Rob Lowe Won the Acting Role of a Lifetime
Aaron Hernandez Wrote Suicide Note to Gay Prison Lover
Carmelo Anthony’s Mistress Will Turn Around The New York Knicks
‘Fast and Furious’ Franchise Spinning Off The Rock and Jason Statham
Good News on Friday: Next ‘Friday’ Movie May Finally Happen
Kim Kardashian Is Selling Candles of Herself as the Virgin Mary and People Are Mad
Amy Schumer Took a $2,000 Piss
It Looks A Lot Like This Kid Mouthed ‘Fuck You’ To Trump