Courtney Stodden Has a Commercial

17-year-old child bride Courtney Stodden finally scored some work in Hollywood. You can now see her as a mermaid in a commercial. Don’t fly too close to the Sun, Courtney!

As you’d expect, they use her in the most inappropriate way possible. Because when you cast Courtney Stodden, you have to get the most mileage out of it.

After two teenage boys “catch” the mermaid with their fishing hook, she says in standard, seductive Stodden-style…

“O-M-G! I’m all wet,” she exclaims, shaking the water off her body.

Clearly pleased with what they reeled in, one of the boys declares, “I scored” as Stodden adjusts her hair and shimmies her shoulders. E! Online

First of all, of course she’s all wet. She’s a goddamn mermaid who was forcefully pulled out of her home in the ocean. You’d think she’d be more pissed about it. If I was half-fish, half-human and a bunch of stupid kids did that to me, I’d be flopping around on the ground yelling, “Hey, what the f**k, assholes. Throw me back in!”

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