Justin Bieber Doesn’t Want Girls Touching His Face

Speaking of Justin Bieber, he was in France yesterday posing for pictures with fans when an overzealous female touched his face. Naturally, Bieber recoiled in horror. “Cooties, cooties,” he shouted over and over again as he ran around flailing his arms over his head.

No, just kidding. He was just taken aback. Luckily he didn’t punch her in the jaw like he did that photog. That would have been embarrassing. For Bieber. Because instead of getting dropped, she’d have just looked at him and said, “You hit like a b*tch.”