Ben Affleck Full of Intense Regret After Not Being Allowed to Direct ‘Homeland’

During his acceptance speech at the Aritos Awards in LA on Monday, Ben Affleck explained how he was set to direct Homeland but didn’t because Jennifer Garner wouldn’t let him. *Makes whip cracking sound*

“It’s true! I was going to do Homeland,” he explained, after the show’s casting director, Libby Goldstein, jokingly called him (and Garner) out during her remarks. (“She had gotten a film/With some sort of thing/And she wanted him home/Well, she does have the ring!” Goldstein rhymed during her speech).

“I liked the show. I signed on. The guys were ready. I don’t want to blame it on ‘her,’ but my wife and I have an arrangement where when she works, I don’t work and when I work, she doesn’t work,” Affleck shared. “She said, ‘I have this movie, it’s 10 weeks, it’s in Atlanta.’ I said, ‘Okay, forget it. I’m sure nothing will happen with it anyway.'”

“Let me tell you something: I hate that f—ing show,”Us

Now Ben Affleck is bitter and full of a regret so intense it’ll eat at him until he explodes in a fit of rage at the most random moment. Like when Jennifer forgets to put ham in his sandwich. “There’s no ham. There’s NO god damn ham! Ahhhhhhhh!” *Throws glass of juice at Jennifer’s head*