Brad Pitt Wants to Buy the Angelina Jolie Sex Tape for $10M

According to the National Enquirer, Brad Pitt is trying to buy an Angelina Jolie sex tape for $10 million so it’ll never see the light of day. He’s afraid that if the tape were to ever go public, it would scar their six children emotionally and psychologically. At the very least, Maddox, Pax and Knox are going to have a very confusing puberty.

“Brad’s out to protect the new image that Angelina has tried hard to build – A-list actress, dot­ing mother of six and UN human-rights crusader,” a source said.

“He’ll do whatever it takes to buy these pho­tos and track down the alleged sex tape.” ShowbizSpy

The tape was allegedly filmed during a “drug-fueled session” in 1999 at around the same time a friend took pictures of Angelina looking strung-out. According to whoever, Angelina was so high that she doesn’t know exactly what she did but it may have involved cutting and kinky sex.

That is to say, if you’re in search of a young Angelina Jolie banging some dude while high and out of her mind, you’d better build a time machine and travel back to 1999 with some coke.