According to the National Enquirer, Brad Pitt is trying to buy an Angelina Jolie sex tape for $10 million so it’ll never see the light of day. He’s afraid that if the tape were to ever go public, it would scar their six children emotionally and psychologically. At the very least, Maddox, Pax and Knox are going to have a very confusing puberty.
“Brad’s out to protect the new image that Angelina has tried hard to build – A-list actress, doting mother of six and UN human-rights crusader,” a source said.
“He’ll do whatever it takes to buy these photos and track down the alleged sex tape.” ShowbizSpy
The tape was allegedly filmed during a “drug-fueled session” in 1999 at around the same time a friend took pictures of Angelina looking strung-out. According to whoever, Angelina was so high that she doesn’t know exactly what she did but it may have involved cutting and kinky sex.
That is to say, if you’re in search of a young Angelina Jolie banging some dude while high and out of her mind, you’d better build a time machine and travel back to 1999 with some coke.
The Rest of the Web, Tuesday, 4.25.17
Whose Penis Does Caitlyn Jenner Have to Cut Off to Get Some Ratings Around Here??
‘The Dark Knight’ Didn’t Kill Heath Ledger
Ivanka Trump Booed At Women’s Summit
Why Chris Pratt Won’t Take A Picture With You
Aaron Hernandez Wrote ‘ILLUMINATI’ in Blood on Prison Wall and Entering ‘Timeless Realm’ in Suicide Note
‘Cash Me Ousside’ Girl Got Her Ass Kicked, How Bow Dah?
Tom Hardy — ‘I Caught the C*nt’
‘The Bachelor’ Chris Soules Allegedly Killed a Man and Will Be Passing Out Roses In Jail
Watching Iskra Lawrence Dance Is One of Life’s Greatest Pleasures
How ‘The Fast and the Furious’ Franchise Turned the Streets Into a Universe
Here’s Reese Witherspoon Running Because She Has to Work ‘Twice as Hard’ as a Man