At the SAG Awards on Sunday, Sofia Vergara talked about how her dad told her not to pursue a career in Hollywood. Not because he was worried that she would fail and have her spirit broken thus resulting in her working at a roadside diner regaling truckers of the time she once auditioned for Colombian #4. He was worried that her magnificent breasts would make her look like a hooker. Dads. So practical.
“My father told me if I did anything artistic, I would look like a hooker,” the voluptuous brunette, 40, joked during the show at L.A.’s Shrine Auditorium. “I told him, ‘With these huge boobs that I inherited from your mother, I already look like a hooker!'”
I imagine her pushing her boobs up to really put an exclamation point on her comeback. Then I imagine her going into her room and crying into her voluptuous breasts. Then I imagine coming in, patting her on the back, telling her “there, there” and then I imagine we, you know, do it.