Kim Kardashian Is Having a Girl

Based upon the fixed constant by which her hips are increasing relative to the distance of her gait, scientists have concluded that Kim Kardashian is having a girl. But figuring that out was a total waste of time because a source already told Us Weekly that she’s expecting a baby girl. *Throws graphs off desk in anger*

Says the source, “They’re over the moon! Kanye always wanted a girl.”

And now that Kanye thinks he’s a fashion designer, he’s going to custom make clothes for his baby. Said Kim, “So I don’t think hand-me-downs are going to work.”

The baby is due in July so expect that kid to be wearing a leather dress and diamond face mask by August. Then watch her be home schooled by the time she’s 7 after being given an immediate swirly on the first day of school.

  • Leah

    Not eating raw fish or soaking in a hot tub are commonly recommended and recognized things to avoid for pregnant women. All the other rules you listed off are also in the same vein. Did you do any research before whipping this trite article up?
    Source: been pregnant twice and read lots of Dr.’s books on the subject.

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