Picture this. It’s Friday night. You just got out of the shower. Your face is covered in lint because you just bought a new bath towel. You fire up your browser and check your social media and you happen upon this. This being an aerobic dance team competition video from the late 80’s from the Crystal Light National Aerobic Championships. You watch the video below.
You can’t explain why you’re so captivated by this. Is it the music? Is it the overly enthusiastic dancing? Is it the freeze frame closeups? Is it a combination of all three? You search for more videos. You find out the show was hosted by Alan Thicke. And he sings.
Your friend calls you asking if you want to go out and drink. You tell him you can’t because you’re busy watching people in spandex aerobicizing their hearts out to 80’s dance music. You hear a confused, “um…,” and then a click. You open another video.
You panic slightly as you realize you forgot to say, “no h**o,” before your friend hung up.