Shia LaBeouf Will Have This Man Killed

Much like Justin Bieber, Shia isn’t done being a douchebag. According to reports, a drunk Shia LaBeouf made a girl cry at London’s Covent Garden restaurant bar the other day. Her boyfriend went up to him to defend her honor. “Why won’t you have sex with my girlfriend? Not good enough for you, Mr. Silk Underwear?,” he probably asked him. There was eventually a scuffle that ended with Shia running after him and yelling, “I can get you killed,” before a group of waiters and bystanders removed Shia from the restaurant.

I wouldn’t laugh about that killing thing. Don’t you know all these Jewish actors have connections to oil barons who employ hitmen all the time? It’s true. I heard it from Kanye.