Polite Banker Bumps Cocaine on the London Tube, Offers Lines to Fellow Passengers

It’s known people in the UK are culturally polite, but 23-year-old Tom Osborne is taking it to a new level. Osborne, a British banker, was caught in a YouTube video casually parading out his cocaine for a bump before offering some to fellow passengers.

“Honey, don’t get rich,” he viscerally shouted between hits. Not having a problem with that, Osborne, but by no means is that going to stop me from making that same declaration an annoying number of times.

A London restaurant manager recorded the 2-minute show seemingly quite openly after he noticed the raucous and brazen behavior. After taking his own bump, the banker turns and politely offers some out to his fellow passenger/cameraman AND THEN checks to make sure he isn’t a cop. Sounds like someone needs to work on his order of operations.

In an absolutely shocking turn of events, people were just trying to get away from him, probably tutting the whole time. Don’t say you don’t ever get something for free, Tube commuters. Additionally, a witness confessed no one could quite believe what he was doing, because it’s not the NYC subway where anything can happen and all dreams come true.

Osborne was identified in the video by “friends,” like the shittiest friends ever, which has put him under investigation at his job in secure network banking. Additionally, it’s been reported by old schoolmates that Osborne is going through hard times, which honestly, who would guess when he’s snorting cocaine on public transportation… Everyone. Everyone would guess that.

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