Paul Thomas Anderson to Direct ‘Pinocchio’, Warner Bros. Jumping on the Live Action Movie Game

Warner Bros. decides Disney is making too much money re-doing their public domain cartoons into live action movies. The Bros. are moving forward with Robert Downey Jr. to create their live-action Pinocchio. 

Paul Thomas Anderson, six-time Oscar nominee, has been brought on to write a draft of a script, that is basically already done for him since people have been beating the story like a dead horse since it hit the public domain. Additionally, he’s been rumored to be a director candidate.

The latest draft of the script was put together by The Giver writer Michael Mitnick and Robert Downey Jr. has been backseat driving it for months since Pinocchio has been Downey’s baby for years. Unfortunately, Downey isn’t set to play Pinocchio or Jiminy Cricket but as a close third… maybe, Downey is set to play Geppetto.

Here I will take a moment to regale you with other public domain stories Disney, Universal, and Warner Brothers are using to sucker your childhood nostalgia and accompanied money with:

  • Disney’s 2017 Beauty and the Beast with Emma Watson with double childhood nostalgia!
  • The Jungle Book both a remake of an animated and live film Disney has set to be released in April 2016
  • Jungle Book (nope this is not a repeat) Warner Bros. are releasing October 6, 2017 which features Benedict Cumberbatch, Christian Bale, and Cate Blanchett with added guest performance capture CGI.
  • The Little Mermaid being done by “don’t leave us out, you guys!” Universal
  • A Tim Burton and Disney venture (gee, I wonder what that’ll look like):  Dumbo

Let’s not forget about the ones that have already happened, we got some billion-dollar Alice in Wonderland that Tim Burton Tim-Burtoned, Maleficent that gave Angelina Jolie her most visually fitting role, and of course the nth remake of Cinderella by Disney. I can’t wait for another 10 years when Disney will decide to remake the animation and sucker me out of a movie ticket that will probably be $20 by then.

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