ESC

Tom Brady Gets the Last Laugh

America’s greatest hero returns. Today, a federal judge overturned the NFL’s four game suspension of Tom Brady for his role in Deflategate. Yeaaa, biatches! Brady gonna wreck shop now. Woot woot! Uhh, so ESPN has the details.

U.S. District Judge Richard M. Berman said NFL commissioner Roger Goodell went too far in affirming punishment of the Super Bowl-winning quarterback, criticizing him for dispensing “his own brand of industrial justice.” Brady has insisted he played no role in a conspiracy to deflate footballs below the allowable limit at last season’s AFC Championship Game.

When Brady heard the news, he grabbed his nuts and placed them on Goodell’s head. That’s basically what this reversal is. Letting Goodell know you can’t act like Judge Dredd. “I am the law.”

Judge Berman cited “several significant legal deficiencies” in the league’s handling of the controversy, including no advanced notice of potential penalties, the refusal to produce a key witness and the apparent first-ever discipline of a player based on a finding of “general awareness” of someone else’s wrongdoing.

One Dunkin’ Donuts even offered Judge Berman free coffee for life.

Now, Brady can go back to repairing his marriage with Gisele Bundchen. Supposedly, Deflategate made Brady really ornery and cranky. He took it out on Gisele which led her to seeing a divorce attorney. With today’s decision though, he’ll be making some sweet, sweet love to her tonight.

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