Based On This Trailer, I Would Rather Be Hit By A Car Than Watch Melissa McCarthy In ‘The Boss’

To be straight up, based on this trailer, I would not watch this movie if you did me Clockwork Orange style and tied me to a seat and held my eyes open with surgical instruments.

In The Boss, Melissa McCarthy plays the wealthiest woman in America and classic boss from hell. The trailer, which makes you feel like you’re watching a bland joke powerpoint that never ends, debuted on Thursday’s episode of Jimmy Kimmel Live!

The film centers around Michelle Darnell, a Trump-like she-beast based on an original character McCarthy created during her Groundlings days, a big shot business mogul jailed for insider trading. Darnell is let loose six months later and forced to move in with the underpaid and overworked former employee (Kristen Bell) she used to torture for fun. Oh god. I almost don’t even want to finish describing the premise of this film because it sucks so hard. After spending some quality time with her former employee’s Girl Scout daughter, Darnell decides it’s time to bounce back by building a brownie empire from scratch using children.

From the looks of this trailer, the only thing stupider and more flimsy than this film’s premise are its jokes.

Peter Dinklage, Kathy Bates and Kristen Schaal also star in The Boss. McCarthy wrote the film with her husband, Ben Falcone, and longtime friend, Steve Mallory. Falcone, who directed the recent McCarthy flick Tammy, also helmed this movie.

I want to support women in Hollywood doing their own thing so hard, but this trailer made me want to take a sensual bath with a plugged in toaster.

The Boss comes to theaters on April 8. I hate it, so it will probably make $50 Million. Check out the trailer below.