Furries Take Cat-Calling To The Next Level On Tony The Tiger’s Twitter

In the long and wonderful tradition of big brands trying to be hip and cool for the kids going terribly wrong on social media, we have exhibit 9047, Tony the Tiger’s Twitter.

While most public figures can’t tweet without some creepy basement dweller verbally jerking it all over them, Tony is proving he’s the real cereal daddy.

Look at how him asking for help completing a simple poem is taken.

@realtonytiger You, sir, are a glutton for punishment. I won't deny your ability to cause swooning, but… #run #thefurriesarecomingforyou

— Robert J. Tremor (@rjtremor) February 14, 2015

It’s a good thing ‘Frost my flakes, Daddy’ doesn’t rhyme with orange.

He never asked for this.

Some opt for the less threatening classic:

Send dick pics @realtonytiger

— .ʕᵔᴥᵔʔ. (@snakewpartyhat) August 24, 2015

Then there’s this tweet from a true master of seduction.

Is your skin crawling yet, ladies? Crawling like a hot muscular man-tiger sensually holding out a spoon of moist frosted flakes for you to take into your mouth?

Savor it.  

I’ll leave you with an eloquent love letter from one Twitter furry, so beautiful that it almost moved me to tears.