ESC

All Those Assholes Who Post Faux-Deep Quotes on Social Media Are Scientifically Proven to Be Dumb as Hell

We all know that guy. They seem to spend half their day posting shit that sounds pretty #Deep but ultimately leaves you feel like they just jerked off all over your face on Facebook.

A new study has found that these tools, who seem to be sustained wholly on a diet of strings of buzzwords removed from their original context, are just as stupid as you’ve always found them to be. People who buy into baseless ‘inspirational’ crap like this:

and this:

In a study titled ‘On the reception and detection of pseudo-profound bullshit‘, psychologists examined whether some people are more receptive to the simple seduction of statements that sound cool, but are in no way actually challenging.

During four experiments involving 845 volunteers, the researchers asked the participants to look at a series of statements and indicate how profound and correct they found them. The researchers utilized phrases such as ‘attention and intention are the mechanics of manifestation’ and ‘imagination is inside exponential space time events’, and others from bullshit handholding guru Deepak Chopra.

These were thrown in with statements that deliberately blended together buzzwords into literally meaningless sentences and mundane observations that could also be considered profound (by really gullible people) such as ‘most people enjoy some sort of music’.

Participants also took part in cognitive tests and answered questions about religion, conspiracy theories, and the paranormal. Gordon Pennycook, a cognitive psychologist at the University of Waterloo, in Ontario, who led the research, had this to say:

“We focus on pseudo-profound bullshit, which consists of seemingly impressive assertions that are presented as true and meaningful but are actually vacuous. Those more receptive to bullshit are less reflective, lower in cognitive ability – numeracy, verbal and fluid intelligence), are more prone to ontological confusions and conspiratorial ideation, are more likely to hold religious and paranormal beliefs, and are more likely to endorse complementary and alternative medicine.”

Take that, guy who constantly posts about “The flux capacity of the universal soul propelling us toward success” or whatever.

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