If at any point in your life you trusted a man who claimed to have lost 100 pounds by eating Subway sandwiches was not sketchy than I’m sorry for your loss; it is most certainly for the best. Subway Jared has been dethroned, humiliated and sentenced to 15 years for child porn and sex with minors. As a Philadelphian, I must also apologize for your lack of understanding that Subway is a sub-par sandwich shop trying to masquerade around the nation in ignorance to the importance of a hoagie (so naturally, one must never trust a thing said or endorsed by them).
To you, I must also deliver the news that Subway used to send Jared Fogle to the Little League World Series. *universal skin crawl* For a number of years from 2008 through 2013, Jared Fogle spent his time endorsing a child-customized Subway baseballs at the event amongst hundreds of children carrying around novelty fat head-like fans of him.
Fogle used his Subway fame to establish the Jared Foundation with Russell Taylor, a man also arrested for possession of child pornography, in effort to raise awareness of childhood obesity. As part of his foundation, Fogle routinely visited and spoke at schools and posted to an unofficially-official really creepy Subway YouTube Channel, “SubWayEatFresh356.″ If CreepyPasta has stopped giving you the adrenaline rush of human depravity, dig deeper into the Fogle tale.
Adding to the disgusting nature of Subway and their spokesman, it’s alleged that Subway continued to send Fogle to the Little League World Series even after serious complaints had already been filed against him. Following the break of Subway Jared’s scandal and arrest, Dr. Phil–ever-vying for his position in primetime spotlight–released audio of Jared Fogle describing how he tricked children into sex (TRIGGER WARNING: sexual abuse) in a recorded series of phone calls between journalist Rochelle Herman-Walrond and Jared Fogle, himself. In 2011, Herman-Walrond filed her complaint to be subsequently ignored by Subway bureaucrats.
TL;DR: Subway sucks, Jared Fogle is disgusting.
(H/T Death & Taxes)