ESC

Someone Leaked the Rules for Models at Kanye’s Fashion Show, Turns Out He’s Even Crazier Than We Thought

Kanye West debuted his new album The Life of Pablo (that album formerly known as Swish) yesterday at a huge event in Madison Square Garden. It was a listening party and kind of like a fashion show, only the models had to stand in place and blankly stare at attendees as they listened to the album.

Literally they just had to stand there, and Kanye handed them a goddamn syllabus of instructions. Look at this shit.

The full list reads:

PERFORMANCE RULES:

QUIET PLEASE

NO WHISPER

NO SMILE

NO DANCING

NO SING, UNLESS INSTRUCTED

NO EYE CONTACT

NO ACTING

NO FAST MOVEMENTS

NO SLOW MOVEMENTS

NO SHARP MOVES

NATURAL MOVEMENT

SHOW PRIDE

HOLD YOUR POSITION

STAY IN CHARACTER

ALTERNATE BETWEEN ATTENTION AND EASE

NO SITTING DOWN ALL AT THE SAME TIME

DO NOT MAKE THE SAME MOVEMENTS AT THE SAME TIME

IF YOU ARE WANT TO MOVE, YOU CAN SHIFT YOUR WEIGHT

IF YOU ARE TIRED, SIT DOWN OR LYE DOWN

CONCENTRATE, FOCUS

DO NOT LOOK AT CAMERA

HOLD POSITIONS UNTIL THE END OF THE SHOW

DO NOT TAKE OFF YOUR CLOTHES OR SHOES

LOOSEN UP NO STIFFNESS

DO NOT BE CASUAL

STAND STRAIGHT

NO SEXY POSING

DO NOT ACT COOL

YOU ARE A PICTURE

BE CALM, BE STRONG, BE NETURAL

BEHAVE AS IF NO ONE WAS IN THE ROOM

DO NOT BREAK THE RULES

KNOW THAT YOUR ACTIONS REFLECT WITHIN THE GROUP

YOUR BEHAVIOR AFFECTS THE CONDUCT OF OTHERS

BE AWARE OF OTHERS AND BE PERCAUTIOS

BEFORE THE END OF THE PERFORMANCE GET UP STAND STRAIGHT AT AT…

KEEP YOUR ASSIGNED POSITION ON THE FLOOR

DO NOT EVER LOOK AT THE JUMBOTRON

And also probably no wire hangers. Goddamn Yeezy.

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