In Other News, We’re Bored So We Invented That Kanye West Is Not North’s Father

When there’s not a Kardashian story to be told, there’s always one to invent. Right now, the rumor mill is spinning with reports that Kanye West is not North West’s biological father.

Allegations began with a source from Star magazine. According to Star, at the time Kim Kardashian and now-husband, Kanye, had gotten together, Kim was all ready to have children as soon as possible and had already had frozen her eggs. Kanye, though, wasn’t ready. The ‘source’ suggested that Kim decided that she would go-ahead with or without Kanye’s blessing:

“There’d been buzz that Kim had frozen some embryos, which she’d created with an ex-boyfriend’s sperm, so she could have a baby when she was ready.”

“When Kanye refused to back down, Kim may have had one of the embryos implanted. She didn’t have time to wait for Kanye to change his mind.”

And Kim was ready. So Kim went for it. But let me let you in on a little investigative journalism secret, you can write source whenever you want some fake declaration of a truth. It’s stock. No weight. It means nothing.

And if you have looked at North over these years, she literally looks like a photoshop morph of both her parents. That beautiful little girl just has to be his.

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