Courtney Stodden Will Dress Her Child as a Girl Even If It’s a Boy

Hold on a second. Courtney Stodden is pregnant? With 55-year-old Doug Hutchison’s baby? How did that even happen? Doesn’t his sperm have the mobility of a 70-year-old pro-wrestler now? Did they just bump around her uterus Three Stooges style and manage to hit an egg. Apparently so because Stodden is supposedly 8 weeks pregnant.

She told Us Weekly that it was an “‘oops’ baby.” Like, “oops, I shouldn’t have stuck my dick in crazy.” Half-joking aside, this was some sort of miracle. She suffers from endometriosis, a condition associated with infertility. She’s beaten odds. Odds that I’m too lazy to look up.

Stodden also told Us Weekly that she wants a girl no matter what which is why “If it’s a boy I am going to dress him up in tutus.” “But wouldn’t that give the kid a complex?,” you may ask. Well, yea, but Stodden doesn’t give a s**t. “I always say I am going to have a girl regardless and if it’s a boy he’ll be gay!”

I’m not sure you can force someone to be gay. I mean, maybe for one night if there was A LOT of alcohol involved and you were a little curious and it’s not like the other guy is in your circle of friends so, really, what’s the big deal?

Ed. note: What happened to her face?! Did the photo agency tag this photo wrong or something?

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7 years ago

For the love of… I seriously wish people had to pass a parenting test before being allowed to breed.