Jaden Smith Was a Vampire, Grew Out of It

It’s been awhile since Jaden Smith has relayed any of his nonsense philosophy on the world. Luckily, the Independent has brought to light more bizarro behavior from this very rich child.

In an interview with French Magazine, Numero Homme (which according to my high school French means Number Man), Jaden says he went through a goth phase and was a vampire for a little while. Though many teens go through a figurative vampire phases, Smith insists his was literal. He states,“I was a vampire, for real. I could not expose myself to the sun and I was only wearing black trench coats.”

Under his definition of vampire, I too am apparently undead since I often wear black and my blindly pale skin can’t handle sunshine. Also vampires: most of the people of New York.

It’s unclear if Jaden realizes that the primary vampire trait is sucking blood and being a mythical being. Either way, he grew out of it. He insists he’s no longer a vampire and goes into the sun frequently.

Just to be safe, don’t invite Jaden into your home. Not because he might be a vampire, but because you’re guaranteed to have an insanely annoying conversation.

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7 years ago

Did lol +1 for you