ESC

Donald Trump Might Be De-Combovering Himself to Be President

You can’t comb over his white nationalist ties, and his Hitler-like tendencies either.

According to the Des Moines Register, Trump talked about changing up his hairstyle at a GOP dinner in Iowa last summer, should he get elected:

“I would probably comb my hair back. Why? Because this thing is too hard to comb,” he said. “I wouldn’t have time, because if I were in the White House, I’d be working my ass off.”

Since he’s already trying to weasel his way out of living in the White House full time, Republican elders are already ditching his transition team, they all had no idea Obama‘s staff would need to be replaced, and the army already hates him because he won’t admit global warming is real, and threatened to replace them all if they won’t kill entire families of people, I wonder just how hard he’s gonna be really working.

Maybe we’ll get lucky and somebody somewhere will decide that having a president that spends his nights swapping intel with Russia and installing his clone looking homunculus sons into positions of power (#SaddamHusseinVibes) is not a good call and will impeach that darth Dorito motherfucker.

Focus on his hair though. That’s what’s important.

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