Read the Best Drunken Office Party Stories and Try Not to Be One of Them This Year

It’s the time of year for office holiday parties. That means seeing middle-aged women expressing their sexuality in unwanted places, men doing coke for the first time since the 80’s and booze-filled mistakes everyone at your job gets to see.

If you want to find out the worst of humanity’s foibles, get to Reddit. They’ve compiled an insane list of most NSFW they’ve witnessed at office parties. Spoiler, most of them are about being way too drunk and weird sexual behavior. One story also involves a Duckboat.

Some prime selections are:

“We bought our boss Sexy Santa lingerie as a gag gift. She tried it on in front of us and proceeded to do a strip tease dance all the while screaming out how her husband was going to love this. She’s 54.”

“Work party. one guy took a s**t in the toilet followed by grabbing the vacuum cleaner and sucking it all up.”

“Our company Christmas party had a tequila ice luge. One of our class A drivers got so wasted he was doing flips on the dance floor and juggling corona bottles, then he went and sat on a 19 year old girls lap and her mom went ballistic. He was kicked out and proceeded to drive himself home. What a guy”

“Christmas party. Married HR woman had an orgy with 5 of the warehouse workers. All still work there, HR woman is still married.”

“We had a “Mardi Gras” themed holiday party. One guy decided to bring his saxophone and be a “jazz man”. Normal enough, right? Well, he also thought that to be a jazz man, he needed to show up in blackface. Luckily, this is rural Wisconsin and no one at the company was black so we all just got really really drunk and told him he’s an idiot.”

“We had a wine tasting for the managers with just some cheese, minor hors d’ouvres, etc. One particular manager got completely sloshed on wine and got super flirty with another manager from a different department who was significantly younger and good looking.

At some point, this young lady put some scented lotion on her hands. Smelling this, the drunk manager came over to her and pulled his dick out and asked her to put some lotion on there too. Right in the middle of the room and tasting.

I heard he was gone instantly. He was recently found out to currently be a tour guide on a duckboat and a bad one at that.”

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