ESC

‘The Bachelor’ Power Rankings: Week 4

Week 4 went pretty much as expected. Corrine stayed. Christen and Brittany were eliminated as everyone could have easily guessed. There’s still Whitney though who’ll probably be eliminated next week because, again, who is she?

So here we are at week 4’s power rankings. The top 3 haven’t changed much. I really need to start a fantasy league so I can put this to use.

1.  Danielle M. (Child nurse person) +0

She didn’t do much this week except look tall. Eh, good enough for me.

2. Danielle L. +0 

Danielle L. got a one-on-one date with Nick in his hometown and smooshed their pastries together. Not a metaphor. Along the way, they staged a meeting with Nick’s ex who played wingwoman. And then Nick took her to the park where he proceeded to tell her that’s where he banged his first chick. What a romantic.

3. Corinne (Runs a multi-million dollar company with her nanny) +0

Did Corrine just spoil the entire season with her Instagram post? What am I talking about? The now deleted post where she shows an engagement ring.

A red herring or is she fucking with everyone again? Who knows but with the amount of times she’s shoved her tits in Nick’s face, I don’t think she’s going anywhere.

4. Vanessa (French-Canadian-Italian) +0

Gave Nick a scrapbook that her students made. Total boner killer.

5. Taylor +5

She, who is younger, asks Corinne if she is ready to marry a 36-year-old. She also said Corinne has low emotional intelligence. Rawr. She’s not leaving at least for another week unless Corinne mindfucks Nick which, at this point, seems really easy to do.

6. Jasmine (Cheerleader, I mean, professional dancer) -1

Still trying to dance her way to the top but her chances are falling.

7. Kristina (Russian hygienist) +6

Tried to work herself into a group date and then put Corinne on tilt. Producers got to love that which is why she got the group date rose.

8. Raven (Midwest girl) +4

She got the 2nd one-on-one with Nick where he told him in detail how she caught her boyfriend cheating on her and beat him with a stiletto. She also loves that Nick hasn’t ever cheated. Great. Set the bar low.

9. Rachel (Attorney) -3

Huh. Was she in this episode?

10. Astrid (Plastic surgery person) -3

She walked in shit for the guy!

11. Alexis (Dolphin girl) -3

She fears Nic Cage and aliens. Face… off!

12. Jaimi (Septum piercing) -3

Man. She can milk a cow.

13. Sarah (Grade school teacher) -2

There are two teachers? Man, I can’t even keep up with this.

14. Josephine (Santa Cruz girl) +0

The Corinne enabler.

15. Whitney (Pilates) +0

Still. Who?

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