Brock Lesnar Officially Retires from MMA

Bye bye cash cow! So sayeth the UFC. Today, Brock Lesnar made official what seemed sorta known already. He’s done with MMA, done with fighting, done with taking punches to the face.

Lesnar’s currently suspended for doping, but would have been eligible to return this July to competitive fighting. There hasn’t been any official statement from Lesnar, but according to MMA Fighting, Lesnar’s notified UFC of his intent.

Lesnar was a big tentpole star, crossing over from wrestling and eventually beating Randy Couture for the UFC heavyweight championship. Then, he started getting punched in the face, turtled up and rethought this fighting thing. Also, there was the diverticulitis condition he went through. Diverticulitis is “a disease where a person has developed bulging pockets in the lining of the gastrointestinal tract, usually the colon.” Lesnar had fecal matter leaking back into his abdominal cavity. Literally full of s**t.

UFC’s losing too many of their big stars like Lesnar, Ronda Rousey (suffers from fist-to-faceaphobia), Anderson Silva (not retired, but close) and stuck with only one, Conor McGregor.

Is the heyday of the UFC over?