ESC

Dumbass Notes From Studio Executives, Need Fewer Women and More White People!

Did you know that heads of studios are usually dumb as all hell? Well, they are!

At a Writer’s Guild of America panel, Oscar-winning screenwriters have stories of the absolute worst notes they ever got from studio heads.

There were gems from Eric Heisserer, who penned Arrival. “It was the start of a pitch, I said ‘There’s a spy and his wife.’ The executive said, ‘There is no wife. Continue.’”

Who needs women in films?

From Allison Schroeder of Hidden Figures, “I was really excited, I was pitching this thriller with two female leads, about espionage. [The executive] said, ‘Oh! We love it! It’s great. Can you either change it to incest or two men? I said, “If you’ll really hire me? Yes.’”

People want to see sisters fucking! Only if they’re hot.

Here’s one from Todd Black producer of Fences. “We made a Western called ‘The Magnificent Seven’ [with Sony Pictures]. And the biggest note in development and shooting it was, ‘Do they have to wear cowboy hats and have facial hair?’ And I said, ‘Do you not want them not to have horses either?’ That was a huge note on a daily basis.”

And last but not least, from the writer of Moonlight, Barry Jenkins: “So, where are the white people?”

Hollywood is a lovely place. For white men and lesbian sisters.