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WrestleMania Brings Out the Child in All of Us

Ah, WrestleMania. The one day a year where it’s cool to admit that you watch wrestling. Or the one day a year you’re chastised for it.

I watch wrestling year round. Don’t laugh. It’s a fine form of entertainment. It takes the best aspects of professional sports and combines it with the best aspects of scripted television to form a mediocre scripted sporting event.

WrestleMania 33 took place on Sunday night. There wasn’t a ton of interest heading into the event, but everyone loves WrestleMania. Except those that hate wrestling. Of course, those that hate wrestling must react like those who hate anything. They can’t just sit back and let everyone else enjoy it. They have to make it known that they hate wrestling, they’re mad you’re talking about wrestling, and you’re dumb for liking wrestling. And, of course, they must let you know that wrestling is fake.

People who watch WrestleMania, whether they are hardcore wrestling fans or only watch once a year, can be perfectly summed up by this tweet:

WrestleMania always reminds us of why we love wrestling.

We love when the 47-year-old boss’ son does some crazy shit like jumping across the ring

Or trying a backflip off the top

Most professional athletes retire around the age of 40. If you’re the boss’ son, chances are you don’t have to work all that hard. This crazy man is nearly killing himself in hopes of winning a scripted wrestling match that he knows he’s going to lose. That kind of lunacy is why people love wrestling.

We also love when people from our past, who we grew up admiring and imitating, return to glory.

The Hardy Boys brought prominence to the tag team ladder match in the early 2000’s. Seventeen years later, they returned to WWE after a seven-year absence to recapture the tag team titles in a ladder match. It’s like when your favorite athlete returns to the team that drafted him and where he had his best years. Except your favorite athlete isn’t completely washed up and isn’t afraid to do some shit like this:

We love when two guys just beat the hell out of each other. It’s really that simple. Flashiness and craziness is cool and fun, but sometimes you just want to watch two guys toss each other around and run into each other really hard.

Finally, we love love.

Yes, that was John Cena proposing in the middle of the ring to Nikki Bella following their victory in a mixed tag team match. Was it a little corny? Sure. Could they have done it in private instead of 75,000 people? Of course. But given the fact that they live a public life and love pro wrestling, why not pop the question at WrestleMania?

And WrestleMania also reminds people why they only watch wrestling once a year.

That was pretty stupid.

There was also a Pitbull concert in the middle of the event. This is why wrestling fans are the best. Because when there is a concert in the middle of the Super Bowl, people get really excited. But wrestling fans won’t stand for music in the middle of our wrestling.

There were also some really boring matches, like Triple H vs. Seth Rollins and The Undertaker vs. Roman Reigns. But those matches were 30 minutes apiece and can’t be summed up in one tweet.

In the end, The Undertaker retired. And millions around the world shed as a tear as a 52-year-old man who has been wrestling for almost 30 years said goodbye. That’s right, we cried because a dude playing a dead man walked away from the sport after a bad match to close the show. Wrestling is emotional.

WrestleMania. Where wrestling fans come together for one night and act like children again.

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