R. Kelly Slave Just Wants to Get Away From Her Nagging Parents

R. Kelly is not running a sex cult. This comes straight from the mouth of a woman that’s part of R. Kelly’s sex cult.

Joycelyn Savage, whose family gained attention for holding a press conference accusing Kelly of enslaving their daughter, stated that she’s right where she wants to be. She didn’t say where she was, but based on the background, she’s in a hotel in North Dakota.

She also wouldn’t give an answer when asked, “Are you with other roommates or are you free to go?”

I just imagine R. Kelly off camera as Ben Stiller from Happy Gilmore when she’s asked that question.

Savage said she hasn’t spoken to her parents in about “5 or 6 months because of everything they’ve been causing. Saying I’m a hostage.” Girl, this story came out yesterday. Either her timeline is extremely messed up or her parents did a bad job getting this story out if they’ve been saying it for 6 months and it just now came out.

This wouldn’t even be a story if Jocelyn sent her parents a quick heart emoji text every couple of days to let them know she’s fine. That’s all parents want. A quick “Doing well. Just working. Love you” and they don’t bother you for at least four days.

That’s my free advice to you, R. Kelly. Spend five less minutes teaching them the sex act you want them to perform that night and five more minutes teaching them proper parent dodging techniques. Then, this becomes a non-story and you’re free to “Bump N Grind” all you want.