ESC

Tom Cruise Broke His Ankle Doing ‘Mission Impossible 6’ Stunt, Wonder If Scientology Will Heal This

Tom Cruise’s faith about to be tested. Cruise, who insists on doing his own stunts, smashed into a wall recently jumping from building to building.

Watch Cruise limp away. Not good. Because it turns out he has a broken ankle. Also, because 50+ year old bodies don’t heal well.

That’s ok. He has Scientology to fix him. Even though Scientology does allow medicine, they also have something called “Touch Assists.”

The purpose of a Touch Assist is to reestablish communication with injured or ill body parts. It brings the person’s attention to the injured or affected body areas. This is done by repetitively touching the ill or injured person’s body and putting him into communication with the injury. His communication with it brings about recovery. The technique is based on the principle that the way to heal anything or remedy anything is to put somebody into communication with it.

Sooo, acupressure? Cruise is gonna love the higher ups at his church massaging his broken ankle. That’s not pain you’re feeling Tom! It’s just your thetan not being one with the broken bones in your ankle.

The stunt sounds fairly routine, but now that it’s in the news, you can bet it’ll be in the final cut.

Director Christopher McQuarrie gave more details on the accident. Turns out Cruise was supposed to slam into the side of a building. Sorta.

The truth is that the stunt was never designed for Tom to jump from rooftop to rooftop which a) would have been pretty boring and b) when you see the actual shot you’ll understand how it was designed. Also, when you look at what was posted on the internet, you can see Tom do the same stunt multiple times. He was always supposed to slam into the side of the building. That’s what gives the stunt its energy.

Since they had to capture the stunt from multiple angles, that meant more risk for Cruise.

What happened is a matter of coordinating what Tom is doing with what the camera is doing, which means you have to do it a number of times. And on the fourth try, he hit the building at a slightly different angle and he broke his ankle. He knew the instant that he hit the building that his ankle was broken. You can see it on his face.

Also, now you have a very funny blooper reel because cameras, obviously, captured it. Cruise had everyone fooled with the mishap.

When we all watched it, none of us immediately realised what was happening on the monitor. Tom got up and hobbled off-camera and we looked at it and went, wow, he really sold that one.

That’s funny, imagine everyone standing up and giving him an ovation then find out dude just snapped his ankle.

Even worse, this might blow their July 27, 2018 release date out of the water. Filming will now go on hiatus for about two months. Not sure you can shut down a production that long and catch up in the end.

Some studio exec is crying into his mound of cocaine right now.

  • Mel

    Too bad his head didn’t explode. He’s a disgusting maniac who supports a CULT.

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