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Tom Cruise Goes Splat Onto Building While Filming ‘Mission Impossible’

Tom Cruise is a crazy person. Not just because he’s the face of Scientology and actually believes whatever crazy stuff they believe this month. But because he’s a 55-year-old millionaire who still insists on doing his own stunts.

Currently, Cruise is filming the latest installment of Mission Impossible. His mission in this movie is to get from one building to the next without killing himself.

Mission failed.

Here’s the problem when you’re 55-years-old and still believe that you can jump across buildings. You can’t. Why do you think they re-cast super heroes every seven years? No one believes that a 50-year-old can save the world because most 50-year-olds can barely get out of bed without their knees creaking and their back popping. The only reason we buy Tony Stark as a 50-year-old superhero is because he’s a millionaire who flies around in an armor suit and doesn’t actually do any of the work. If Stark were Captain America, he’d be dead.

The “splat” in the video is pretty unnerving. It sounds like every bone in Cruises’ body breaks as he slams into the side of the building.

I give Tom Cruise a lot of credit. He’s a brave man for continuing to want to do his own stunts. But no one will think less of him if he just retires from doing stunts. I’m willing to bet that most movie goers don’t even know that Cruise does his own stunts. They just assume it’s a double because why the hell is Tom Cruise doing his own stunts?

Here’s my suggestion, Tom. Stop doing your own stunts. And stop making Mission Impossible movies and make Top Gun 2 before Val Kilmer actually dies and you feel bad. The world doesn’t need more Mission Impossible movies. The world doesn’t need Top Gun 2 either, but we do need one last Val Kilmer movie.

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