Bad News, Kim Kardashian West Planning to ‘Tone Down’ Her Nudity

This is like messing with the secret sauce, you don’t do that. Millions of fans love Kim Kardashian West for her scantily clad photos. Who can forget the ass that broke the internet? There’s also her recent nude pic posing in a tree.

That’s all about to change. Maybe not tomorrow, but soon. She talked to Allure about all her nudity and her expiration date for it.

Is there an age limit for the naked photo shoot?

“Yes,” she says. “I’m like, I’m going to tone it down. But then I’m like, Wait, I can’t be doing it in 10 years, so — I might as well. I don’t know what the age cutoff is.”

It’s not an age thing, it’s a gravity thing. Also, there’ll always be a new Kim Kardashian West. There already is. She’s called Kylie Jenner. When Jenner gets old, someone else even younger will take her place.

Kardashian doesn’t need to worry about when she’ll be too old for nudity. The public will decide that for her.

Also, in the same interview, she says she and Kanye West never give each other gifts.

“I don’t like presents anymore,” she says. “We just did absolutely nothing [for our anniversary]. We spent two days in Santa Barbara, and we slept.” Then she remembers: “You know what? I think we went to IHOP. That’s what we did.”

This sounds like old people marriage.

She does cherish one gift that her kid North gave her. Before her Paris trip, the one where she got robbed, she was scared for other reasons, namely terrorism. She suffered anxiety and even saw a therapist about traveling there. Must be good to be rich and able to see a therapist because you’re afraid of terrorists.

Anyway, North gave her a tiny box filled with fake plastic jewels and said, “‘Mommy, this will keep you safe when you go to Paris.'”

Kids say the sweetest things. They also don’t know s**t because obviously that box didn’t keep her safe.

In memory of Kim Kardashian West’s nudity, here are some shots of Kim in various states of undress. R.I.P. fat titties.